Posts Tagged ‘Givers & Takers’

Sometimes random crap just goes through my head and then I decide to write about it…unfortunately for you poor souls who have to read it! Haha but a couple of days ago I was chatting with my bestie and I was talking about the book I’m writing (yes, I’m writing a book…or more like trying to write a book because so far all I have is the title) and I mentioned how I have all these “one-liners” that I always use sometimes, you know, when you say or do something stupid and you’re like “And that’s why I’m single”! Haha and that one liner is one I use a lot, unfortunately, and which conveniently brings me to this post. I think about why I’m single…and I’d of course like to blame it on all of the stupid men I meet, but I must take some (or at least a little) blame myself. I am PICKY. So, I’ve decided to create a Want Ad…of the perfect significant other for me. I’m smiling right now because this should be good! LOL! Okay, here it goes!!

WANTED – Single male (yes, you must be single…”seperated” from your wife is not going to fly…nice try asshole), tall, handsome and nice body, with especially nice chest and arms! (Hey, this is my ad…I can ask for what I want!) Must have a good sense of humor. (Believe me, you’ll need it!) Must have a job. Must not live at home with your parents. Must have a car. And it must run. And it must be presentable enough to be left with valet! (I’m just saying). Must be younger than 65 but please, older than 22! (Unless you are a super hot 22 then I might be able to consider you but will check ID). Must be around when I want to see you. But must not expect to see me more than once maybe twice a week…or month, depending on my current mood. Must answer my texts immediately. Must be thick skinned and not get your feelings easily hurt. (Remember, good sense of humor). Must not ask me where I was…or what I was doing…I’m a single mom…just assume I was home with the kids! Must be gullible! Must be fun! Must like wine. Must like vodka. Must like paying for wine and vodka! Flowers every now and then are great…handbags are better! Must like dogs. Must never, ever assume you come before the dogs. You should love a good meal! And you should love paying for good meals! LOL! Must know when to keep your mouth shut…or even better, don’t speak…! And most of all, you must be able to tolerate a BRAT!

Hmmm, did I leave anything out? Did I say sense of humor? Yeah, without that…you can’t survive me! LOL! Any takers? 🙂 Anyone? Hello? Yep…and THAT’S WHY I’M SINGLE!

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I’m sort of embarrased when I see that my last post was on May 26th. Seriously? What the hell have I been doing? I mean, its not like I’m out there making the big bucks…so really, what have I been doing? Raising 2 teenagers…check. Taking care of 3 dogs…check. Making sure 2 birds and 2 hamsters have water and food…check. Making meals…check. Doing laundry…check. Cleaning house…check. Working some lame ass part time worthless piece of shit job…check. Drinking…NOT ENOUGH!

Okay. So I’ve been a little busy with every day life. But really. Blogging is the best relief for my everyday, sorry ass, life…so what the hell have I been doing? For days I’ve been saying that I’m going to write and yet, I find myself never doing it. I have a problem with that. When my life gets crazy and things are not really going well…I sort of hide. I become a recluse. I stop talking to people. I stop doing things that make me happy…because then reality sets in and it just makes me miserable again. Ugh…IS IT EVER GOING TO BE MY TURN? I’m being serious here. Whoever is in charge of this fucking thing…when do I get a break!

Okay. I vented. I feel a little better. I find that when you’re feeling shitty about yourself or your life or job or whatever, it helps to look around and see that others have it shittier than you. So you should probably just stop your whining. So, today I looked at my searches. You know. The things people search that bring them to my blog. Haha and yep…suddenly my life did not seem that flippin bad. Since tomorrow is my 6 month anniversary of when I started my blog, I thought it would be fun to see some of the sorry ass people that have gotten sent my way.

I don’t want kids, is that why I’m single” – If you’re a man(and lets face it, a man typed in this search)…yes…that and you’re probably just an idiot.

Teenager rule book” – If I had that, these effen teenagers wouldn’t be running the show over here. In fact, I think I’m going to go search that one myself!

What do I do if I’m dating a disfunctional man” – First. Learn to spell. That will help you attract better men. Second, I can spell and I attract the biggest losers around. So don’t come looking for your answers here people!!

I am looking for a mickey mouse t-shirt that says – your not the boss of me” – Hahahaha really? What the hell? How did that get you here? And who would wear that? I hope its for your kid and not yourself, weirdo. And it’s you’re not your. Geez what is wrong with people!

Picture of a night mask with a monkey face” – LOL! This is so funny. Because I have one. And I have a picture posted. Here. See, I’m an idiot and that’s why I’m single. Hey, whoever searched this…I stole it from my daughter…I would not buy one for myself. It’s a joke. A joke!!!

Givers and takers” – I think my dad must be learning how to use the computer! Dad – do not read my blog. You will not like it!!! Just saying!

Friends who are disfunctional around birthdays” – Does anyone know how to spell these days? Seriously? It’s dysfunctional people! I would know…I am as dysfunctional as they come. And to whoever searched this…if they’re dysfunctional around your birthday…they are dysfunctional all the time…run! Find better friends! (Note to self: take your own advice)!

And my very favorite one – “arnold schwarzenegger soundboard and its not a tumor” – Bwaaahaaaaaa! Tears in the eyes funny! I bet you were a little disappointed when your search led you here…to a post about my weird conversations with my children and the childish ways I behave while “parenting” them. Haha…that one really makes me laugh. And why, really why was someone searching for that?

Oh boy. That was kind of fun. I could go on. There really are some strange…yet sad, searches going on out there. Makes me wonder…what is the stupidest thing that I’ve searched? Hmmmm, that could be another post!!

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Growing up my Dad had this “speech” he would give, over and over again. He would start it, “There are Givers and there are Takers”. And yep, that’s about all I remember. I’m sure right about then, I would zone his voice out and think about something else, anything else. I was a teenager…I didn’t care about Givers and Takers. Of course, in college, I still heard the speech. In fact, in my house, it was fun to see who you could get stuck listening to the Givers and Takers speech. Haha, when my cousin just started dating a new guy, we were walking through the house and I mentioned that she hadn’t heard the speech…and that did her in for an hour or so! Haha, ohhhhh miss those good times.

But now, as an adult. That speech. I think I suddenly realize that my Dad was right (of course, I will not ever let him hear me say that). There are Givers and Takers. You don’t have to know the rest of the lecture to understand it. The first line says it all…There are GIVERS and there are TAKERS. And I think ultimately what he was trying to say is that he raised us to be Givers…but watch out…because Givers attract TAKERS.

Man, I wish I had listened to the rest of that lecture when I was 16! Maybe I wouldn’t be so damn good at attracting the Takers. My parents really did raise all of us girls (I’m the youngest of 4) to be Givers. My Mom, she is the ULTIMATE GIVER. Geez, if Giver is in the dictionary, my Mom’s picture should be next to it. She has been giving all of her life, to my dad, to us girls, to her grandkids and now her great-grandkids. She is an Angel…and she knows how to Give, and only Give. I’m not sure she’s ever Taken in her life.

I’m proud to be like my Mom. I mean, in the whole scheme of things, I would rather be a Giver than a Taker any day of the week. But, I’ve always said that my biggest fault is this…I always take care of others, no matter what the cost to me. Sure, that makes me a great friend…but it doesn’t always make me happy. And it definitely brings the Takers to my door…sometimes more often then I’d like, unfortunately.

Of course, normally when I start a conversation about Givers and Takers, I tend to think it’s going to lead towards discussing what idiots I end up dating…and eventually not dating. But not today. Today, I’m dedicating this Givers and Takers post to the friends I’ve made. Not all of them…because luckily, through all of my dysfunction, I have managed to actually make a few good friends…Conflicted Mean Girl, for example (haha the fact that I use Conflicted Mean Girl as one of my smart friend choices makes me chuckle just a little, hahaha). And of course, any of my friends reading this…I hope you know exactly where you stand in the Givers and Takers speech.

So, lately I’ve been a little ticked off about the behavior of some of my friends. And I start to let it get to me. In fact, this past week, I’ve sort of been fuming over their behavior (or lack there of actually). I mean, when I look back at the things I’ve done for some of my friends, it practically brings tears to my eyes that they can’t give back even a quarter of what I’ve given them. I know. I know. Friendship isn’t about making everything even. Believe me, I know that. Just ask my friends. I give, without hesitation. I open my house to them for months, without a single request for money of any kind. I drive them to their cars after their drunken nights out, I give them money for gas and cat food. And I listen to them bitch about friends, boyfriends, jobs and whatever they want to bitch about. And I do all of this with the belief that with true friends, what comes around goes around. Right?

Wrong! Apparently, not everyone is like me. I always find myself disappointed when I figure this out, but yet I don’t ever seem to learn my lesson. But really, as a Giver…I attract Takers. And they just keep taking and taking and taking…until I literally feel like there is nothing left for me to give. That makes me so sad. Because I keep looking, waiting for them to start giving back to me now that I’m down in the dumps (of course, for those of you who have read my blog, my life is full of “down in the dumps” I just never lead on that it is), but this time, I am really down in the dumps…and its obvious…and my friends see it and they know it. And are they there to help, to comfort, to give advice, or to even just give me a hug? Nope…they are no where in sight.

Why? I think I know why actually. Because Takers may be Takers…but they are not dumb. And they know that when I’m down…I don’t have anything to give…SO…they just lost their use for me.

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